Pausing the Evaluation

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth


“Not everything needs to be assessed immediately.”

Some thoughts need time, not judgment.
Probability wants answers.
Possibility wants space.

Pausing evaluation isn’t denial, it’s incubation.


No grading.
No verdict.
Just room
to grow.

Purposeful Journaling Practice:
Write without rating ideas as good, bad, realistic, or unrealistic.

-Kerri-Elizabeth-
Tomorrow, we let possibility stay unmeasured.

20 thoughts on “Pausing the Evaluation”

  1. This is a beautifully gentle and wise reflection.

    I love how you distinguish between probability and possibility, giving each its own space and tempo. That phrasing—“Probability wants answers. Possibility wants space.”—is quietly profound, reminding us that not every thought or feeling needs immediate categorization or judgment. It honors curiosity, imagination, and the natural unfolding of ideas

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  2. That is right. For example, to find out what is true you need to give it time. However, we want immediate answers, and our news cycle is very short. When a news story breaks we often know very little and by the time we know better we have forgotten the story and we only remember the early speculation as facts, and we collectively remember wrong (Mandela effect). In science you discover something, you make experiments to check it out, you write down the result and give people a chance to evaluate the data and for them to repeat the experiments. Sometimes a peer reviewed paper can take a year or more before it is even published. Pseudo science, on the other hand, provide quick but faulty answers. We have to learn to wait for truth. Evaluation takes time.

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    • I’m taking this class right now and the instructor has targeted me as someone he can push around, fail constantly and be completely disrespectful to… I’ve taken 4 classes and it’s been a lesson way more than what I went in to learn.. I had no idea what I’d face nor could I have ever imagined it.. I’m observing and not reacting, I’m listening and not quitting, I’m at times so frustrated with him I’m literally inside either crying or screaming.. he knows he’s being this way because he comments after with a subtle”sometimes I can be a little…..”. I go in weekly to use my own practice time to paid to have and learn more when I can evaluate it and observe what I’ve learned then go do it later with some peace and thought. I’m working hard to not judge him or his actions, however after 4 classes and 4 practices I have come to the point where I either quit or respond to the behavior and I am continuing until I can observe and experience my own ability to evaluate without jumping to a reaction, giving it time to be CLEAR and it’s becoming crystal clear to more than just me… to continue, to finish and meter into the experiment with observation and see more than what I see with my own eyes and feel inside.. to monitor my own behavior and speak with kindness even when kindness does not exist is this experiment.. a sort of science of self and time and how it changes or not based on facts and data, the day and time, the people in the experience and seeing more. When we remove ourselves too fast do we make an impact that’s important or has value for either person, that’s a lesson I’ve learned and value and am able to articulate better , sometimes not until I’ve vented to my husband and heard his thoughts and talk about it… rationally not reactively.. getting there is definitely listening past a new clip and deciding and evaluating more than what’s in front of you. A sort of un focus from what your focused and allowing it to speak differently.
      Good point you’ve made and I’m in the experiment fully.😂

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      • Some instructors forget that their students are their customers. Tests, grades, questions, communication etc., should be polite and fair. Instructors don’t have to give out good grades to everyone, but it should fair, respectful, and the instructor needs to do a good job serving his students. However, I have seen teachers/instructors who mistreat their students, as if they think they are little kings. Well it was a long time ago when I was young, but in any case, when that happens a lot then the instructor should look for another job. I am sorry you have to go through that. I think you are approaching it the right way.

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        • That is so true.. Some instructors forget that their students are their customers. I didn’t even think of that angle. So true.. this guy owns the place and is the instructor.. he’s aweful and it’s kept me up at night with thoughts. I’ve decided not to finish the course but instead I’ll be showing up Tuesday to speak respectfully to the situation and make it my last. More for me than for him, because I doubt anything I say will change him, but for me the lesson is having a voice to the way I was treated and put an end to it with honor . The reason I went was shown clearly that it wasn’t why I thought I was there and the observation and time showed me exactly what I needed to see and close it before it becomes another lesson. No need to continue the frustration , or lack of being able to use my own thoughts and creativity…and being literally bullied and grabbed with force to do it HIS way ONLY. That part I’ve been so in shock about I have needed time to process reaction and response and find clarity. I’m there and tomorrow is the day I speak. Simple words need no response , too many words will invite defense and more of what I’m putting closures to.
          I feel terrible for all the ones that don’t speak except behind his back… the fear is mighty felt there and everyone just puts their head down and hopes they aren’t the ones targeted that day.
          I’m no longer going to be the target!

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          • That is terrible, he is a little king of the class room instead of serving his students. My wife was stuck with a guy like that back in college and unfortunately she did not have the option to opt out of the class. He was particularly hostile to her for whatever reason. So when she was about to have one of the unpleasant meetings with him I came with her. He was not happy to see me but it was allowed and it forced him to be reasonable. However, if it is possible to take a different class I would do that. Little academic kings who’ve never worked in industry isn’t worth dealing with.

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            • My husband would have gladly came with me to support me but I wanted to do it myself, it had more reasons to face it than I ever knew. If it was a college have to like your wife I definitely would have brought him with me.
              It’s done now and although I over thank it until did it, of course his response was , the exact way I thought it would be, the nice guy , the lure to retry , I dealt with that change in him continually, punch you, then ask r u ok kind… no more classes there .. I left everything I made behind and closed that door, the meaning closed many life time doors… it felt amazing!!

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    • That was my kitty Angel she used to travel everywhere with me , we climbed trees together, crossed rivers and climbed many mountains together and traveled hundreds of miles together , she was amazing.. she found her new home one day on a farm she loved catching wild animals and running free … my friends built her a log cabin , to stay in she no longer wanted to travel and chose freedom to run and she never liked being inside much.. my friends said she would bring wild turkeys in she ran w deer and reminded them of me. She ended up drinking some water from a puddle that was contaminated.. they tried to save her and spent thousands , they loved her too.. she didn’t make it but she sure left a legacy of love!!!!💕 I have many many stories of her.. she saved my life after my son passed away at 24…

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  4. I’m sorry for what you’re dealing with, Kerri. It sounds like that difficult instructor has issues. You are learning lessons – but they’re not the ones you expected.

    That’s such a beautiful picture of Angel. What a gift she was during your time of inconsolable grief. She and Zac are together, watching over you still.

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