earth

Raindrops

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth
  • rain-drops

It is when you realize all attachments to emotions are like rain.

~Kerri Elizabeth~

Within every rain drop a mystery 

Power in a rain-drop creates history

Anticipation of more appears

Raindrops enter like heaven’s tears

Cleansing all thats near

How many are there

Where did they hide

Is there matter attached inside

How does condensation appear

With weather, with temperature, with the clouds near

Why don’t the clouds fall down

Does a raindrop feel the ground

Raindrops inspiring curiosity and wonder

Often joined by sunshine and thunder

Watering the earth 

Filling the lakes

Provoking inspiration through Gods grace

 

SUNSHINE

Somedays will be so hard you wonder, how and where, what and why? What is hard now , won’t seem hard later, your strength is always challenged by the coming together and falling apart of life. The rain will come, it will wash away some things and it will dam up others.

It will depend where you are standing when it rains, you must decide when the rain is talking to you and when its cleansing you. Is it moving you or is it cleansing you and how will you know?

Nature always explains everything, it is the grace of God speaking.

You may not see grace in it, you may only see fear or grief and so many other feelings of despair you just don’t want to bare.

When you stand in the grace the emotions will not be attachments but simply rain drops reminding you, you’re alive!

Scars

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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A path of presence is identified by the moments you feel your experience.

~Kerri-Elizabeth~

 

A  path of presence

Resides inside

Waiting to be felt

Alert and aware 

Do you dare

Feel the scars you bare

By sight you may see 

 Scars on every leaf

Scars upon the trees

By sight you may see 

Scars upon a cheek

Scars mistaking us as visually weak

Every scar will leave a story

An experience bared

Healing to share

Nature reveals the dance

Along every path

Beyond a glance

Scars reveal another chance

SUNSHINE

 

We have scars on the physical self that reveal the stories of our life. Then we have the scars inside that reveal the experience of moments in our life often stopping time and the ability to be present in NOW.

A scar a sign of strength that you are capable of healing.

They are there to teach you and to grow you not to trap you and to close you.

Create  space where new outlooks are revealed. Getting stuck in the mundane and the ordinary leaves you walking a path unhealed where presence cant be felt or experienced, only wanted and never touched.

 

 

 

 

 

The Pace Inside

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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The pace inside is based on our own courage to surrender the entangled knots inside to the stillness that knows no time or restraints!

~Kerri Elizabeth~

Perpetual perseverance
Demands its authority
Appearing through emotions
Tears overflow integrated and entangled
Happiness, sadness and surrender have no separation
Inevitable movement continues
“Stop please”, I ask, “just for a moment”
“Slow down, I dont want to miss a second”
The ocean responds, ” I am ”
SUNSHINE

There are times inside the chaos and the history of trauma and our pasts get so knotted up inside we can not feel the stillness, there is a lack of movement and oxygen.

When I get to this place I always realize I am holding my breathe, not trusting and worrying about things I can not control. Then a dilemma, when I decide and realize what I can change, often it’s not what I want to change.

This brings anxiety and it all starts to overflow and tears come like a dam that just broke. It is inevitable, emotions will move, our lives move, our bodies move, our lungs take in and let out air, movement. Our hearts beat, our blood moves, our world continues and the pace inside must find a way to courageously let go and flow with peace and stillness.

Stillness is not without movement. This is a term set out to teach one to stop and feel what is moving without additional purposeful movement, such as the heart and lungs, and our blood flowing.

Meditation and body position invite courage to surrender giving room for oxygen to change the chemistry of the emotion and anxiety to freedom.

This is a lifestyle not a quick fix…

Creating Stars

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

You create the stars in your own sky, the reflection comes from the love you have inside!

~Kerri Elizabeth~

 

The craving of a lake

 Oxygen seeping from the trees

Breathe

Sunshine and the soul

Moonlight and darkness

Constant shifts in the breeze

Speak to me

Power in the stars

Mesmerizing from afar

How do they know where to be

Gravity you say

Maybe there’s more

Did God make it that way

Maybe, or he or she, or more than either of these, made it a different way

Can we see more than what we believe

What if the stars are all one light

A blanket of energy exquisitely bright

Creating stars

By the limits our eyes can focus at night

Are we planted in the universe

By a tiny seed

Growing only by the beliefs we think we need

Are we creating the view

Convincing one another

What is true

SUNSHINE

Quivering Refinement

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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It’ll be in the calmness of the breeze, a peaceful ease, the ripples will reflect the quivering of life aligning and refining you.

~Kerri Elizabeth~

 

In the calmness a clear reflection occurs

A peaceful ease

Then a breeze

Ripples quivering the reflection of life

Aligning and refining

To the vibration of mothers earths choice

Scattered thoughts fall into place

Nature reminds me, stillness has a voice

To align you

To refine you

~SUNSHINE~

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Truth and Courage

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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Every emotion felt has grown from an experience past, waiting to be set free at last!

~Kerri Elizabeth~

The urge to sustain in an experience past

To flutter in the moment pleading it to last

Wandering into the crevasses of anywhere

Filling the cracks one at time with life

Otherness becomes clear

Visualizations take shape and appear

Truth and courage trump fears

Like a wish in the breeze

Setting every emotion free

You’ll see

How super fantastic your world can be

SUNSHINE

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Part 3 “Changed Forever”

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

The Universe belongs to us all in abundance, the resource of all healing, understanding, unconditional love and freedom to explore more, when we are open to more, more opens to us!

~Kerri Elizabeth~

Down a dirt road…..

In a space where my wounds were opened and Mother Natures land held me and the skies enveloped me and Zak(my forever 24 year old son in heaven) confirmed his presence to show me the way.

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It was an early cold morning, a long night talking with Zak, trusting he had my back. Things were different inside me this morning and I felt like Zak had my hand.

I didn’t know what I was doing or what was about to happen, but I knew it was going to change me forever.

Just as Zak told me it would.

No words were said, an uncomfortable silence lead the morning. A story that would change my life that day arose. I roared from an inner flight or fight, everything inside, that had been bottled up, unshared, unheard and undone was ready to fight for me, finally.

I erupted from a silence inside, every emotion spilled out like a waterfall. It was spilling out of every cell of me, frustration and silence were completely uncapped, there was a break down that soon gave me ground for a break through and the universe said, “Lets DO this!”

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This is where it gets sticky, where someone else is involved and blame can be placed. However when you blame, you give away your power to shift your lesson into wisdom. I surrendered into it and let it eject from my core with the force it was demanding. It was time to shift and that meant inviting source energy to swirl me in gratitude for the moment presented.

It was about gratitude not blame, it was about standing in my truth and my power and allowing the universe to fill me with the natural emotions I was honored to experience and I was trusted to assimilate it all, so I could eventually share it.

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THEN…..My entire life felt as if it stopped, for a second, panic, I embraced it, for a second anger, I embraced it, for a second, blame, I embraced it, for a second I wandered too far into someone else’s story and needed to get back to mine.

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Ultimately it’s what is inside you that creates your view. What I saw next, was a new view, and I felt Zak say, “mom I got you”.

I looked around and the silence and serenity was one with me and all that nature offered was a part of me.

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I drove my car down the long bumpy dirt road, missing the potholes that were gracefully placed. One wrong turn of my steering wheel meant I could bottom out and rip the under carriage among other things in my car.

I had no phone service where I was and although that wasn’t a big deal to me, I knew I needed someone to be on the other line as I experienced the shock waves barreling though me.

I looked up and the dust of his truck disappeared, the engine I could no longer hear, I called and he answered, what was said next, shot me into a slow motion reality and then the phone was silent.

I was frozen in time, and I will tell you this part of the lesson is so

deep for me.

Telling one side and leaving the other side only in my journal has been something I have truly had to dig deep into before deciding. How do I tell just one part without the other, it all creates the total story, of love, loss and devastation, learning, living, creating and reinventing, or does it?

We all have a journey we must travel and for me, my journey is to stay present in my own healing because that is ultimately where I have freedom to be me, all of me! Thats where I am empowered and transformed, thats where change is made.

At the end of the day, did I live my truth, fully and without hesitation? 

Did I love with all of me?

At the end of the day, do I feel good about who I am?

Life is our experiences and what we learn from them is up to us.

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I live to the fullest and I love to the fullest. I also am hurt easily, super sensitive and I never want to hurt anyone. I’m an old soul empath and a Libra to the core, hurting anyone is the most painful thing to me and I use to own it in my own worth.

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NOT ANYMORE!

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This is one of my biggest challenges I have been doing the work on for years now. Not owning others pain, walking with them, not for them. It took me years to see this and I practice it daily, living in the present moment and asking myself, am I willing to feel it fully to heal it fully? Is it mine to heal or shall I return to sender?

I made it to the end of the dirt road carefully and took a left making it about 1/4 mile, I felt my body give way, I had no air to breathe, my chest caved in and panic and shock set in. I pulled over and went down another dirt road to cry and scream and to just let go.

I finally had service on my phone here. I called my mentor who is an energetic healer.

My panic said it all, I needed immediate energy help, I spilled out the finer details and then needed to get off the phone. I felt immediately sick and needed to scream to the heavens. I hung up and fell to the ground surrendering all of me.

I wept harder than ever on my hands and knees in the dirt and screamed to the heavens, I surrender, I don’t want anymore pain please, take me, make me, do whatever, just please no more, no more. Whatever I have to do, help me create a new path, a look outlook.

I called my mentor back and just set the phone down unable to talk. THENNNNNNNNNNN.…….. in the mountains in Utah in the hills, set nestled into the trees of a path less traveled a fighter jet flew so low and right above me I could see the details,( Utah trees where I was, were short) then another, the ground rocked, my car shook, my angel kitty took cover and I burst into tears. It was Zak, and not just one but 4 or 5 I’m still not totally sure the number but my friend said to me on the phone, its Zak. Thats Zak and if I wasn’t on the other line I’m not sure even I would believe what just happen.

In Zak’s honest engine voice, he said, ” mom what I couldn’t change on earth I can intercept from heaven, because your my mom.” I chose you to be my mom and my place as your son is never done. He continued to share with me so much more. I pulled up my boot straps and explored and wrote. This journey had just begun for me, it wasn’t just a Zak healing anymore, Zak was with me, he laid out a plan and it just kept rolling. I followed and along the way a fighter jet would confirm to me I was going the right way.

You see when Zak took his last breathe, a fight jet rocked my world as I crawled outside and laid lifeless and frozen for hours before I could move again. After he crossed over I took a long drive to my favorite place on earth. He continued to show up in fighter jets among other signs that came left and right. This one has shown up at the oddest times and places but the perfect times and places for me.

I can go on and on about Zak’s presence with me, my journey and all the signs he was so close, but this moment in perfect timing, in a fully traumatized state on my knees in the mountains of Utah in the exact second I surrendered fully, right above me, close enough to see details, he showed up to confirm to me, he intercepted my path and changed my view, exactly what I asked for at exactly the same timing.

Confirmation, we have only the power we allow!

Zak lives on and there is never a day he does not show up…………………..

Zak took me back to every space on that 40 day journey that needed restoration and a new view and we healed it all.

I am free to be ME!

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