gap

A WARRIORS MOTHER WITH LOVE

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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There is no choice other than love for me, I am a warrior’s mother chosen to be.

Kerri Elizabeth

Relapse into the greatest love of all.

Relapse is a word that explains, time to kick ass and take names.

A good cry and a few swear words will suffice and then action and believing is my own advice.

The news hit hard, the words took charge, my heart dropped a few beats and my chest became tight and landed at my feet.

My brain lost oxygen, nearing the feeling of passing out, the initial feeling has to make its way out.

Tears soaked my face; shaking took over me from the inside feeling the memory of the pain he had to endure the first time.

He doesn’t want to talk, he says he doesn’t want this in existence, he says he’s ok and I know he is, in his own explanation that’s the only way he chooses this moment to live in.

One moment at a time, he’s at work right now, writing songs and living what he loves to do.

His strength is beyond measure, his perseverance is his deepest treasure, he is full of love and compassion inside, and he has a tough exterior to some outside.

He saves his heart for only the best and those that make it inside are forever loved and protected by his warrior spirit all the time.

He takes one moment at a time and reminds me along the way, to stop and allow his journey to be his way.

He reminds me we all have a path we choose and when he gets the chance he reminds me where he learned that too.

So after a few hours have passed and tears have flooded my path and my heart has felt the impact, I now am reminded of this precious gift where both of us learned a new language gift.

Listen to me mom, with all your might, listen to me and hear me inside, look at me and see me and hear what I am telling you freely.

The only thing I would change about my childhood mom is that I would be heard without you saying a word.

I have the honor as his mother to listen to his heart and feel his music, to hear his words and hear his feelings.

I can dance to his music, laugh with his humor and cry with his pain and I can stand tall and remember I was given this position as his mother, trusted and chosen to be the strongest warrior’s mother.

So my shoulders are back, my posture is stellar, my mind is intact, my oxygen is level.

My spirit will carry me through the shift in the wind, and I will keep the gap that divides my fears and tears with pure love within.

He is a warrior child and he is my son, there is nothing inside that will tear that down, his strength and determination is more than profound.

So today will pass in an hour or so and tomorrow will bring me another day to continue to show him that I am listening without a word to whatever he feels he can put into words.

Every moment matters and I will continue to be, strength, perseverance, determination and purpose to be a warrior’s mother every day.

He  has a girlfriend beautiful and bright, she radiates love and light, her heart abounds with passion in life and she has made it inside to his warrior life.

He has three sisters as well and let me tell you this army of love has nothing but strength in it.

There are always choices except this one, love is the only option in this family, there is nothing bigger than our hearts working together as one.

With all the love that surrounds him and the strongest love within him, he is always an inspiration to me and to anyone honored to be around him, look for him and see, he is a musician and a writer of his own music and beat.

SUNSHINE on every MOMENT with LOVE as the only option and component.

A Shift In The Wind

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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A shift in the wind gives us choices to make.

Kerri Elizabeth

When the wind blows harder the resistance and or excitement to go out in it takes its place.

I am now moved to decide, do I go or do I stay within?

When the wind blows I am allowed a decision to make.

When the wind blows I have a feeling that is no mistake.

When the wind blows I have choices I can take.

I can create a story out of what I see in its wake.

I can stand in it and feel the wind on my face.

I can resist it and fall into it and see if it will holds me up or I fall on my face.

I can trust it and believe its presence has a purpose and place.

I can believe it can be bottled up and sent off, I can sell it and make a profit on top.

Whether you believe it or buy it or share it or feel it, prove it, live it, love it, compare it, it is only inside you how personal it is and no one can decide for you that place you live in.

The evolution of my growing has been best served in knowing that when I remember who I am, I am moved to decide, do I go or do I stay within?

The flicker inside of me, the wind that blows by me, the waves that crash on me, the inspiration shining around me, the light coming from me, the words that fill me, the life that leads me, the knowledge building in me, move me inside to decide, do I go or do I stay within?

Staying within the moment is my processing place, like simmering dinner or marinating a steak, like making the best slowly thought out chocolate cake.

What I won’t decide is how you will interpret the wind, how you will assimilate it within.

What I do know is I feel the wind blow and then decide, do I go or do I stay within?

I’m grateful for the love within that holds me up when the wind blows by me, the waves crash on me and I am grateful for your sharing around me and the knowledge that grounds me.

I am grateful for the opportunities that life gives me to feel a familiar wind and be reminded I have a choice to go in it or stay within, to react or respond and or repeat it differently or the same again.

I am grateful for the wind that blows around me and the choices I am served that may change me, challenge me, teach me,  and ground me.

They lead me to the very place of deciding what I can do to serve love all around me.

Sun shining rays of light that have guided me on my path, enjoy the rays that may inspire you and continue to share with me how you decide to feel the wind around you?

The Gap That Divides Us

Posted on by Kerri Elizabeth

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I learned that the gap that connects words and feelings, people and places and religion and races is the gap of division I created myself by allowing the perception of anything other than love itself.

Kerri Elizabeth 

Things I have learned.

Saying the word water does not make me wet.

Saying I can swim doesn’t mean I can swim.

Saying I can run without running does not mean I can run.

Saying I am not upset until I am not upset does not fill in the gap for me between love and being upset.

No matter what you say to me, I must feel it and let it be, to move through it as I grow is my own gap only I get to go to.

I simply have to close in the gap, it is a quiet place where I can reach higher than me.

For me, it’s God, my safe quiet place where I am held in a deep embrace, where no judgment or words have a place, where silence is my grace.

I have learned that words have a place, feeling them is each individuals dividing place.

Where a higher source can be felt and embracing that is the place where the gap is embraced.

There is no empty space between you and me; to me it is a gap that is often seen as a safety place, a division, a boundary, a protection place, a choice we have in how our own interpretation is made.

I learned that the gap between two walls is often a place where I fall.

I learned that falling into the deep embrace of exactly what fills that space is the eternal love that I can feel and saying it doesn’t make it real, I have to go in it and feel.

I don’t know what that place is for you; I just know that gap between each person and word is a place all your own you can be heard.

Sunshine on your own journey, your way, your feelings, how you choose to live, that is the gap I found forgiveness within.

I learned that if I waited for someone else to change based on what I know they did, that left the gap for me to live in a waiting hall for someone else’s choice on how they want to live.

SUNSHINE in the gap of every dividing place, it is where I learned I exist.